We’ve all been there. You serve up a lovingly prepared Instagram-worthy meal and your child wrinkles his nose like you’ve offered him a plateful of gruel. Breathe easy. Picky eating is a common childhood quirk, but how do you know when it becomes more serious?
First, let’s address the elephant in the room (or, more accurately, the broccoli on the table). Picky eating, in itself, isn’t necessarily a problem. It’s normal for children to go through phases where they favor certain foods or textures. So, what’s the line between a normal “blech, peas!” and a cause for concern? Here are 4 picky eater problems to keep an eye on.
1. The Great Food Refusal
Is your child refusing entire food groups, like all vegetables or all protein sources? While it’s OK if he’s not a fan of everything, a complete aversion to entire categories can indicate nutritional deficiencies. (Did you know low zinc levels can affect appetite and cause kids to avoid meat?) Many parents accept food refusal until a certain age (usually 7 or 8, according to psychologists at Child Mind Institute) and then finally decide they have a problem. But the longer the child avoids a food group, the harder it is to get him to try new foods.
2. The Raucous Gag Reflex
Does your child gag, throw up, or exhibit extreme distress at the mere sight, smell, or touch of certain foods? This could be a sign of sensory food aversion, which is important to discuss with a pediatrician or therapist. It’s more common in children with ASD and can be triggered by texture, temperature, color, and smell. In many cases, one negative experience can cause a child to eliminate a category of food. For example, your son gags on a piece of cucumber and then rejects anything green in fear it might have the same effect.
3. The Growth Chart Blues
Is your child’s growth falling off the charts? If her picky eating is leading to weight loss or faltering development, it’s time to ask the pediatrician for guidance. Here’s a chart for boys and one for girls from the CDC for you to check out.
4. The Fear Factor
Does your child exhibit extreme anxiety or fear around new foods? This could be a sign of ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder). According to KidsHealth.org, ARFID starts at a younger age than other eating disorders and is more common in boys and children with ASD. Signs of ARFID are denying being hungry, fear of new foods, a strong reaction to smell or texture, and fear of what might happen if they eat, like stomach aches and choking. A friend’s son has a fear of choking and is working with a food therapist who started by explaining how digestion works.
Here are some battle-tested tips to navigate picky eater problems.
- Start small. If your child has an aversion to a particular food, just having it on the table might be your first step.
- Make mealtime a positive experience. Ditch the pressure and focus on creating a fun, relaxed atmosphere. Play music. Laugh about spills or messes. Dress in green from head to toe and make your kids call you “Broccoli Woman” all night.
- Offer choices within limits. Present two or three healthy options.
- Don’t force it. If you say “just one bite” and your child takes one bite, consider it a victory and move on.
- Don’t expect overnight change. Dr. Jerry Bubrick from Child Mind Institute says he has a rule with patients. Since it takes time to adjust to new flavors and textures, he says kids have to try a food three times before claiming not to like it.
If you realize your child’s food issue is more than you can handle, it’s OK. Some of these ideas might not work, and you need to seek help from a doctor, a therapist who specializes in eating or feeding disorders, or an occupational therapist.
And Mom, try not to take it personally. You’re not a bad mom if your child only eats nuggets and apple slices. With a little understanding, patience, and help, you can navigate this phase together and, hopefully, raise a little foodie in the process!
What have you tried to do to solve your picky eater problems?
