“But it’s Saturday,” I said to my teen. “Take a day off.” He shook his head. “If I don’t do a little homework today, I’ll be stuck doing it all day tomorrow.” I didn’t know what to say. On one hand, yeah, kudos for being responsible. But on the other, I worried about his mental health. He’d begun to feel increasingly stressed and burned out. Talking to other parents, I learned my kids’ school district wasn’t unique. The stakes feel higher for high school students today. And as a parent, I don’t want to feed into that.
If your teen’s under lots of pressure too, he or she may not want a sit-down, heart-to-heart convo with you. But your teen may read an encouraging text. And that could help your kid make it through the day or a stressful evening. Send texts as needed. Here are 37 ideas to start to help reduce academic pressure and let your teens know you’re there for them.
Let her know she’s more important to you than a grade.
1. You are worth more to me than any grade or award.
2. Failing doesn’t make you a failure.
3. I love you whether you finish your homework or not.
4. You are NOT a failure.
5. You are loved.
Help him zoom out and look at the big picture.
6. How would you rate this problem on a scale of 1 to 10?
7. Grades don’t matter as much as your health.
8. In the grand scheme of things, you’re doing fine.
9. Everyone struggles. But struggles don’t last forever.
10. It’s just math (or fill in the blank). You’re good at so many other things.
11. If you’re having trouble in this class, others probably are too.
12. No one grade, paper, or school outcome is going to make or break you.
Give her the empathy she craves when she has academic pressure.
13. I know you’re sad. I’m so sorry.
14. I went through something like this too.
15. You’re right. What you’re going through stinks.
16. You’re not alone.
17. I understand what you’re going through.
18. I wouldn’t want to be a teen these days. It’s hard.
19. I totally get it. (You have so much homework, too much to worry about, etc.)
20. I didn’t have my life figured out at your age either.
21. What you’re feeling is real, but what you’re thinking isn’t true.
Give him a dose of encouragement.
22. You’ll get through this!
23. Talk to your guidance counselor, and tell her you’re overwhelmed.
24. You can do hard things.
25. Move on to something else.
26. It’s going to be OK.
27. Take a few deep breaths.
28. Just hang in there.
29. You always make it through these rough spots!
30. Remember when [this happened] and how you worked through it?
Help her look ahead with hope.
31. High school isn’t forever.
32. You have so much life ahead of you.
33. Taking care of your well-being today will impact tomorrow.
34. It feels so important right now, but when you look back in five years, it won’t be.
35. You don’t have to have your life figured out right now.
36. You have time to think about what you want to do.
37. When you’re feeling ready, you’ll make your move.
Unfortunately, academic pressure is a reality for most teens today. And knowing what to say to support our kids can be hard—our experiences were so different! But a short and sweet text from you could open the door for a few seconds of relief. When you’re teen’s overwhelmed, be the support he needs. Knowing you’re in his corner thinking about him can take some of that pressure off!
If your teen is facing academic pressure, what are some of the signs?
