For many moms, “it’s complicated” sums up how we feel about traveling for our jobs. It’s why in addition to packing our laptops and work clothes, we might also bring along the guilt of leaving our kids. I even stow away those anxious “what if” thoughts to chew on like Nerds Gummy Clusters (which I also throw in my travel bag). If you want to stop carrying all that extra baggage on business trips, follow these 5 tips for working moms to make your work trip easier.

1. Let your child know you’ll be gone.

As a 2-year-old, my daughter started to get into watching NFL games and making her own weekly picks, just like we do on ESPN. So, from a young age, Reese knew that Mommy travels for work to talk about football. However, before leaving town, I still make sure she knows when I’m going, where I will be headed, and when I’m coming home. Right now, my son, Jack, is too young to understand, but I tell him, too. It helps make my leaving a little bit easier because it’s not a surprise for the kids.

Talking with your kids about your work trip gives them a heads-up about a change to the family routine. For example, on a typical day, I make Reese breakfast and take her to school. When I travel for work, that changes for her. Preparing kids ahead of time helps make the transition smoother for everyone. Try writing your trip down on a printable calendar to give your child a visual. (Try this Good Character Traits for Kids version.)

2. Leave a little note for each day you’re gone.

Each day I’m gone, I leave a little note (like these) or a small gift for my kids. It’s a small way to show them I’m thinking about them that day. And, since my daughter is a little older, she hypes up the notes to Jack. In the morning, she’ll say something like, “Baby, I wonder what Momma left for us today! Let’s go see!” It gives them something fun to look forward to and helps them pass the days quickly.

As a working mom, the demands of travel can be tough, but these small gestures create a heart connection across the miles. Whether it’s a simple “I love you” or a funny joke, each note serves as a daily reminder of your presence and love. These little surprises will bring a smile to your child’s face and offer a sense of consistency and comfort in your absence.

3. Stay connected while you’re away.

The best tips for working moms are the simplest ones, and this one is a no-brainer. Phone calls, video calls, or even swapping emojis or silly videos via text lets your child know you’re thinking about her. Consider setting a time each day for a call and making it special for each child. For example, you might read a bedtime story or sing a lullaby as part of the call, or maybe your child wants a virtual tour of your hotel room while telling you a joke he heard from Dad.

But sometimes, that call can end in unexpected tears because your child misses you. In those moments, instill confidence in your child. Remind her that she’s safe and loved and that you’ll be home soon.

4. Encourage your husband. 

I could not do what I do without my husband, Josh. His love for our family and support of my career keep me going. But I know traveling for work can be hard on all families, including my own. Routines get disrupted, responsibilities get shifted, and home life runs differently when Mom is on the road.

It’s why I think one of the best tips for working moms focuses on the dads. Let your husband know how much you appreciate the extra load he carries in your absence. Send him a quick text, leave him a voicemail, or even plan a special date for when you come back home. Parenting on your own takes a toll, and your intentional encouragement shows your husband that you value him.

5. Give yourself some grace. 

As moms, we hear a lot about what motherhood is supposed to look like and how we’re supposed to do it. Thankfully, one of the things I learned in my job is to block out the noise. Still, whether you travel all the time like me or just periodically, it’s hard not to get wrapped up in the fact that you feel like you’re not there enough or that you’re missing moments with your kids. But, Mom, the work you’re doing is important, too, so give yourself some grace and space to excel at work and as a mom.

When you find yourself having a tough day being away for work, remind yourself that the work you do matters. You’ve got talents, expertise, and experiences your colleagues depend on. Plus, you’re modeling for your child time management, purpose, and a healthy work ethic. And it’s cool to have your kids really proud of something that you’re doing, too.

What are some of your favorite tips for working moms you love to share with your friends?

The post Laura Rutledge: 5 of My Best Tips for Working Moms Who Travel appeared first on iMOM.

I’m grateful for my job and love what I do, but being a working mom over the summer is physically and emotionally tough. I want the lazy mornings, endless snacking, and pruney fingers from the pool. Instead, I juggle schedules and attempt to squeeze in a summer bucket list activity on a day off. Do you feel stress that doesn’t jibe with the sunshine and lemonade mood, too? If so, I see you, and I’m with you. Here’s why summer is tough for working moms and what we can do to enjoy it a little more.

A working mom has to be in two places at once mentally.

You’re at the office, and you feel a buzz buzz from your phone. There’s a photo of your kiddo petting a koala at the zoo’s day camp. Or you work from home, and your kids are in the back yard running through the sprinkler while you chat with a colleague on a Zoom call. Your mind is in two places, and it’s hard not to feel like you’re shorting everyone—work isn’t getting your best, and your kids aren’t either.

And we get jealous of stay-at-home moms, even though we know we shouldn’t.

I wish I could be the mom who says, “I’m ready for summer to be over. These kids are getting on my nerves!” Now, trust me. I get it, and I don’t blame stay-at-home moms, but I’m still envious. You get to jump into summer with both feet. I’m over here putting a toe in while my hands are still on my laptop.

I want to be the activities director for a change instead of signing them up for camps. I don’t want to have to jam activities into the weekends. Stay-at-home moms, I know it takes sacrifices to do what you do, but over the summer, we working moms wish we could trade places with you.

Then we think about our kids and worry.

When you pictured being a mom and what the seasons would bring, you probably didn’t imagine summer being a whirlwind of camps, lunch packing, and checking in to ensure your older kids made it into the house safely after being dropped off by the carpool.

As a working mom, I always wonder if my kids are having the summer experience that every kid deserves. Have they been cheated out of their childhoods? Am I prioritizing the wrong things? I’m not saying the thoughts are rational, but they’re there.

And there’s not a clear solution.

I love that our articles on iMOM always give some encouragement and practical ways to work through whatever parenting problem you’re dealing with today. But I don’t know if there’s a tip or trick this time. We could say, “Working moms, summer is what you make it,” or “Do what you can and trust that the great memories will be created.” Both of those are true, but they’re not quite enough. Speaking for myself, my heart is still heavy.

But there is a bright side.

While you’re working, your kids are learning really important character traits like independence, resilience, and social skills. Sure, you want to be there having fun, but the trade-off is a win for them. And I promise there’s another mom (or 50) just like you in your neighborhood and at your kids’ school who feels all the things you feel—the two places at once, the jealousy, the worry, the stress. She’s taking a random day off in June and a few in July, trying to make the most of every minute.

Your kids and her kids are making great summer memories. They’re getting sweaty, snacking all day, playing in the grass, and staying up late. And while they do all those special summery things, they see you working. But not just at your paying job. They see you putting in the work day in and day out to give them a great childhood. And we see it, too.

What do you do as a working mom to enjoy summer with your kids?

The post Working Moms—We See You This Summer appeared first on iMOM.

The challenges of a stay-at-home mom tend to be sidelined and even I’ve been guilty of trivializing my struggles. In truth, all mothers face challenges, regardless of our circumstances. But the life of a stay-at-home mom is not always easy. These are just three of the most difficult challenges I’ve faced so far. Have you dealt with these, too?

1. The loneliness is real, and it can really hurt.

Some days I go from 8:30 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. without speaking to a single adult. Toddlers are often talkative, but theirs is not the most stimulating discussion. The result is an overwhelming need for adult conversation.

Thank God I’ve been blessed with a community of mothers who have children nearly the same age as mine. We have weekly playdates and if I’m completely honest, they’re just as much for me as they are for my children. We also try to schedule monthly get-togethers without children, as well as regular events that include our husbands. These amazing fellow moms regularly remind me that while the life of a stay-at-home parent might be lonely at times (or often), we are never alone in our struggle.

2. Separation anxiety is a force to be reckoned with.

Since I spend all day at home with my kids, they do not respond well to strangers. I often find myself reluctant to leave them alone with others. In order to make the transition to school easier, we had a “trial run” with a one-week, half-day summer camp. I’m not sure who cried more on my son’s first day of camp—me or him. I do know that while he was at camp, I was agonizingly counting the minutes until I could pick him up.

But we’ve been able to take advantage of nearby friends and family to help encourage some separation. The benefits of this arrangement are two-sided. My kids get the opportunity to be away from me for a while and I’ve been able to use that time to write, shop, or attend kid-free events with other mom friends, which also has helped ease my separation anxiety.

3. It can be difficult to find a place to fit our passions.

Being home all day, I find myself looking for ways to fill those hours that once were spent on work. Initially, I had to ask myself what I am, other than a wife and mother. What am I passionate about?

Personally, I love to write. So I find time to write regularly during naps and in the evening. In addition, I’ve surrounded myself with other mothers who also see the value in pursuing your passions. We work together to help one another realize our dreams.

More often than not, I find that the answer to many of the challenges of staying at home can be found in a community of mothers. If you have one, hold onto it like the lifeline it is. If you don’t, do what you can to find one. Check Facebook, your church bulletin, your library, the local playground, and any other place where mothers might come together. You’ll quickly find that you are not alone.

What stay-at-home mom challenges have you had to deal with? 

The post Can We Stop Minimizing Stay-at-Home Mom Challenges? appeared first on iMOM.

We have habit trackers for moms and for kids (because they need motivation, too!). We’ve even included habit tracker ideas to get you started. Just click and start adding structure to your chaos.

Floral Habit Tracker

Ideas to spark your creativity: 

• Floss.
• Say something encouraging.
• Avoid ______ (sugar, soda, alcohol).
• No non-budgeted money spent
• Get sweaty (work out, play with the kids, do yard work).

Download

Geometric Habit Tracker

Ideas to spark your creativity:

• Write in a gratitude journal.
• Water the plants.
• Text someone just to say hello.
• Cook at home.
• Go to bed with a clean kitchen.

Download

Daily Details Habit Tracker

All your good habits in one place!

Download

Faith Habit Tracker

Ideas to spark your creativity:

• Say a morning prayer.
• Spend time reading scripture.
• Pray in the car.
• Sit in silence, taking deep breaths.
• Pray with the kids.

Download

Sibling Love Habit Tracker for Kids

Ideas to spark your creativity:

• Let your sibling have the seat you want.
• Give a big hug.
• Do one of your siblings’ chores.
• Tell your sibling something you like about him or her.
• Let your sibling have the last word.

Download

Chores Habit Tracker for Kids

Ideas to spark your creativity:

• Go to bed with a clean bedroom floor.
• Make the bed.
• Tidy up the pet’s toys/food.
• Put away toys.
• Wipe off the bathroom counters.

Download

What habits do you want to start tracking and why?

The post Habit Tracker Ideas for Moms and Kids appeared first on iMOM.

Do you ever feel like you’re running on empty with no charger in sight? Or maybe you’ve tried getting rest with a monthly massage, and that’s just not making a difference. Well, there’s actually a tried and true way to reenergize, but for it to work, you first have to change how you think about rest. Here are 3 things too many moms say about rest—and the most effective way to recharge.

“I’ll rest when…”

You know, I’ll rest when the school year ends. I’ll rest when my kids are bigger. I’ll have time to chill in the next season. After nearly 15 years of mothering, I know this: each season of motherhood has its own opportunities for moments of rest and its own dangers for burnout. My kids used to take naps and go to sleep hours before I did. Here, in the middle season of mothering, they are usually at activities, games, and hangouts long after I’m ready for bed. But now I don’t have to load anyone into the car to go to the grocery store anymore. I can stroll the aisles of Target alone.

How to recharge: Practice a Sabbath day and lean into the quiet moments you have in this stage of parenting. If you have little ones who move constantly, spend your Sabbath with another family so the kids can play together. Older kids? Give everyone a break from chores and tech, and take an afternoon nap.

“I am resting.”

Have you done it, too? Plopped down on the couch exhausted and instinctually reached for your phone, giving in to a scroll session and telling yourself you are recharging. How about a late-night binge of that new Netflix show? I’m afraid we have been sold a bill of goods, friends. Though there is nothing wrong with the scroll or the binge, it is not real rest. Real rest is not just not working. Real rest also includes plugging into what really brings you life. Think about it—if we merely shut our phones down when they reach the red zone without plugging them in, they’ll never charge up.

How to recharge: Does food bring you joy? Practice Sabbath with a big meal and family around the table. Don’t rush to clean up. Let everyone eat seconds. Do you feel full of life after a run outside, digging in your garden, or reading your Bible? Do that with no time limit. Sabbath is all about giving ourselves permission to do what delights our souls. Don’t settle for a fake rest.

“I don’t need to rest.”

I recently heard that both Ronald Reagan and Margaret Thatcher boasted that they only needed five hours of sleep a night. It was a badge of strength, I suppose. Unfortunately, both of those world leaders developed Alzheimer’s disease, which has been linked to a lack of sleep. That’s extreme, I know—but resisting rest can do damage. We push through the warning signs of burnout or breakdown, subconsciously telling ourselves we are stronger than the red zone. In his book Invitation to a Journey, Robert Mulholland says what we all know: “We live as though our doing determines our being.” We deny the need for Sabbath, for the recharge, in order to get a leg up on the housework, to get in the extra hours at work, to get another workout in. Work, work, work. Your need for rest doesn’t make you less than. It makes you human. And I have yet to meet a mother who is not human.

How to recharge: Know that observing the Sabbath and resting is what is best for you. God commands it. We have to trust that we are good enough even when we are not producing. Sabbath means we lay down the god of efficiency and choose to be present in the moment, just as it is. I’m not very good at any of it, but I think it is a test I will be given until I pass. Now, has anybody seen a charger?

How can you reenergize and find rest in your daily life?

The post 3 Reasons You’re Exhausted (And the Most Effective Way to Reenergize) appeared first on iMOM.

As busy parents, it’s easy to get into a groove with work, kids, school, and extracurriculars. We coast on autopilot certain times of the day. It causes us to miss out, and not just on learning the directions to someone’s house. We miss out on conversations with our kids about life. We miss out on really seeing, hearing, and perceiving our kids.  But we can practice more intentional living—especially during these three parts of the day.

1. Driving Time

Driving time can feel repetitive for a mom, and let’s be honest—it can be boring or even frustrating (like in the carpool pick-up line). But driving time actually can be one of the best times to talk to your kids. You have a captive audience. The day is fresh in their minds. You aren’t eye to eye but side by side, making it easier for many kids to talk (it’s less intimidating). So instead of zoning out on your 57th trip to the dance studio, ask questions instead.

Aside from the usual “how was your day,” here are some questions that evoke thoughtful answers: What did you do in (favorite subject or class) today? What did you play at recess? Did anything funny happen today? What are you looking forward to? Do not let your first question be, “Do you have any homework tonight?” That is not the first thing kids want to think about after school. Think favorites first: favorite friends, classes, sports, interests. For access to hundreds of questions you can ask your child, download Family First’s Q & U app. If you still can’t get your child to open up, or if he or she just seems worn out, try telling a funny story about your own day.

2. Mealtime

During meal prep, involve your kids in more side-by-side conversation by asking them to chop, stir, or set the table. While they are helping, again, ask questions. Or, put on some fun music and dance around being silly, or ask Google to tell you a joke, and then tell each other your own made-up jokes. When you sit down at the table, one popular question to ask is “What was your high and low today?”. Go around the table and have each person share. Your high is the best part of your day and your low is the worst part. This simple exercise can be eye-opening as you get a glimpse into each person’s day and heart. Another way to get everyone talking is to ask each person to share a story from the day. Maybe it’s something that happened on the bus, maybe it’s an amazing soccer goal, or maybe it’s just a story of how they lost a library book. Big or small, getting a snapshot of the day is priceless.

3. Bedtime

Many parents have a bedtime routine. At our house, when bedtime arrives, we say “teeth, potty, pajamas, bed.” After that, we read a story, then pray. And while routine is good for kids, it also lends itself to autopilot. When we are tired and perhaps ready for some alone time as parents, it’s even harder to be present at bedtime. But it’s possible. Don’t start the bedtime routine too late. To avoid feeling rushed and anxious, give yourself plenty of time for all the things your child typically does. Let your children accomplish as much of the bedtime routine on their own as they can. Standing next to your children while they complete every step makes bedtime seem to take a lifetime. Join them for story and prayer time and commit to giving them your undivided attention.

Make storytime fun and don’t rush prayer time. As the last item on the agenda, it can be easy to rush this, but it not only can be a time to pray with your children but also to listen to what is on their hearts. This is the time many kids want to talk about deeper things. Don’t miss the opportunity.

What are your tips to get off autopilot and truly see, hear, and be present with your kids?

The post Are You on Autopilot? appeared first on iMOM.

A few weeks later, my children asked why I quit and if I could go back. One of them even fervently cried about it. I was stumped. Hadn’t I done the right thing?

In time, I realized that the main reason I quit was due to fear that directing took too much from my family. But what I didn’t know was that this job, my art, my passion, actually gave them some very valuable gifts.  Here are 4 reasons you should pursue a personal passion for play or for work, for your children’s benefit.

1. Children love to see you doing something you love to do.

When you truly enjoy doing something, it shows. It fuels you. You get excited about it. Kids can sense that, and the excitement is contagious! Giving yourself time to express yourself in a different way makes you a more well-rounded person. As my daughter says, “if Mom is happy, everyone is happy.”

2. Children cherish being able to come alongside you and be a part of something you love.

Kids feel so important when you bring them with you where you do what you’re passionate about. Seeing you “in action” helps kids understand and respect what you do and love. They see your hard work and they want to work hard with you. In addition, they want to celebrate your hard work. They are proud of you.

3. You’re being a good example for them to follow as you use the talents God has given you.

God gives each of us talents and gifts. 1 Peter 4:10 says, “Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” Do you want your children to pursue their passions and use their talents only in childhood? Of course not. A mother’s prayer is that her children continually follow their interests throughout their lives and continue to perfect their God-given gifts so they not only bless others with their talents but live life to the fullest.

4. You’re giving your kids a vision of what God is doing outside the home.

There is so much going on inside our homes that demands and deserves our attention. But God is doing great things outside of your home too, and He wants you to be a part of them. In Matthew 5:16, Jesus said, “In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” When you use your talents outside the home, your children become aware that there is a world out there that needs light.

That’s not to deny there are definite seasons in our lives and sometimes, certain passions have to take a back seat to current family needs. God knows you use many different talents being a mother (nurse, detective, teacher, and the list goes on). Other times, there are other pressing needs, like personal health concerns.

God’s timing is so, so perfect. During my off-season, I needed that time—for my health, for learning, for searching, and growing. It was all part of His plan. And thankfully, two years later, He has brought back the opportunity to direct. Having a fresh perspective and being freed from my fears, I’m ready to begin again, and my family is right here with me.

What is your talent or passion? Do you feel God calling you to use it?

The post How Working on Your Passions Benefits Your Children appeared first on iMOM.

I don’t want to race through one life experience and on to the next without learning the lessons God has for me in every step of every season. I want to be a student of my own life and I want to allow my reflection to transform me into a better human. I believe this process of slowing down is vital to making wiser decisions for me and family. We are all pretty good about making space for this practice during natural reflection times in our lives, like birthdays and anniversaries and even at the start of a new year. But I’d like to encourage you to take time to do a seasonal self-reflection every few months using this guided, 3-part practice.

When did you last create space for yourself for quality quiet time?

The post Why We Need to Make Space for Seasonal Self-Reflection appeared first on iMOM.

In the moment, it can be hard handling stress. But sometimes, these moments can surprise you.

A voice inside my head ordered me around and told me all the things I needed to do and all the things I wasn’t doing well. But all of a sudden, the sweetest sound, the voice of my older daughter, Harvest, broke my inner monologue.

Harvest: “Hey Mommy! Hey Mommy! Hey Mommy!”
Me: “Hey, baby, what is it?”
Harvest: “I want to tell you something. Mommy, did you know that you’re a rock star?”
Me (totally caught off guard and chuckling a bit): “Awww, thank you, baby! Why am I rock star?”
Harvest: “You’re a rock star! You’re a rock star because you make dinner, put our clothes on, fix our hair, and make our bed. And you work! You’re a rock star.”

Up until this point, I had spent most of that day convincing myself I was a total failure as a mother. I felt pulled in a million different directions, meeting my family’s needs, maintaining friendships, preparing to move, and adjusting to a new job. I especially was concerned with how distracted I’d been in this season of transition and how that negatively could affect my daughters. My sweet girl spoke words of life directly over my greatest fear in that moment. She silenced my inner critic.

I don’t know what you’ve got racing around in your heart and mind or what the voice inside your head is saying to you today. But I’m here to tell you something important. Regardless of how you feel, mom, you’re a rockstar, too! If you find yourself doubting that you are a good mom, here are some practical ways to fight these voices of doubt that are lying to you and stealing your joy.

What helps you remember that you’re a good mom?

The post Mom, Do You Know You’re a Rock Star? appeared first on iMOM.

Our decisions to set our alarms for far earlier than usual were inspired by St. Josemaria Escriva’s heroic minute, as outlined in his book The Way: “Conquer yourself each day from the very first moment, getting up on the dot, at a fixed time, without yielding a single minute to laziness. If, with God’s help, you conquer yourself, you will be well ahead for the rest of the day.” So I set my alarm for 5:30 a.m. and hoped for the best. Here’s why you should pick a time and stop hitting the snooze button, too.

More Silence

The heroic minute provided much-needed silence. Each morning became the calm that kept me grounded, which prepared me well for the day’s chaos. I could hear myself think, which allowed for reflection and relaxation. I felt refreshed.

More Space

The heroic minute also provided space. Much-needed space, between me and the hustle and stress and bad drivers that so long had distracted me from inspiration. It provided space between my day’s start and my obligations, so I could do what I want to do—pray, read, think, write, exercise—before it’s time to do what I’m not as excited to do.

A New Mindset

The heroic minute provided a new mindset about mornings. I’ve always thought of myself as a night owl, but mornings, I learned, can look majestic, like the sun as it rises through the trees in my back yard. Mornings can look practical, like doing laundry, making lunches, or creating my to-do list. And mornings can look funny, like accidentally texting a friend at 3:30 in the morning, the day I forgot other time zones exist.

Self-Mastery

But the best part of the heroic minute is being more in charge of me than my snooze button is. Your snooze button isn’t the boss—you are. The heroic minute promotes self-mastery, which is a skill that fosters virtue in us. It’s a skill that sets the tone for the whole day. Which is one of the reasons why now, I challenge you. Set your alarm every day, for the next seven days. Commit to not hitting the snooze button. Then, see what happens. We think you and your children will be affected in ways you won’t expect—good ones.

What’s your favorite way to start the day?

The post Why You Should Stop Hitting the Snooze Button appeared first on iMOM.