“Why don’t we just cover the coffee table in bubble wrap?” my mom sarcastically commented when she saw my babyproofing haul from Target. Outlet covers, doorknob guards, a latch for the oven door… My son hadn’t even rolled over, and I had identified every potential danger within our 1,800-square-foot house.
As a new mom, it’s incredibly difficult not to imagine your child being the one who has the freak accident that some gadget or safeguard could’ve prevented. But there comes a point where babyproofing isn’t prudent. Here are 4 signs you’ve gone overboard and how to find peace anyway.
1. Your child isn’t allowed to explore (like, at all).
I loved my son’s Pack ‘n Play. Until he learned how to climb out of it. As much as it cramped my style that he’d learned to spring out of his tiny jail, it was a good reminder that he was curious and needed to experience more.
Our kids need to find the treasures inside the kitchen cabinets. They need to discover that their chubby legs are strong enough to climb onto the dining room chairs. That’s why this season of life is so physically and mentally exhausting for moms. You have to allow them to explore but protect them from exploring too far, and that line of “too far” is constantly moving.
2. You’re always on the lookout for new dangers.
If you asked me what ranked at the top of my list of potential dangers when my kids were little, I’d have said outlets, small toys, and my hair straightener. Never would I have said “walls,” but according to the 2023 Childproofing report from Safehome.org, walls ranked right under chairs and sofas, beds, and—coming in at number one—stairs and ramps for causes of ER visits.
My point? You cannot foresee every way your child could get hurt. If you’re obsessed and it’s causing you anxiety, then it’s time to ask yourself why you’re trying so hard to control the environment. Why is your fear so great? What can you release to help that fear subside a little?
3. There’s no room for natural consequences.
One of my girlfriends just had her first child at 41. Since I’m well out of the toddler stage, I get a total kick out of her stories. She says he appears to have a death wish. He bangs his head on furniture and grabs forks off the kitchen counter. Because I’m not his mom and have some perspective, I can listen, laugh, and say things like, “He’ll learn!”
But when you’re watching your toddler risk life and limb, it’s hard to shrug and allow natural consequences to happen. Still, you might be taking babyproofing too far if your child hasn’t learned what causes a boo-boo. It’s better for him to experience it under your watchful eye, where you can scoop him up and give him one of your magical kisses that makes everything better.
4. You’ve allowed it to give you a false sense of security.
“I never expected the stroller to hurt my baby,” my friend told me after her daughter tipped her stroller back, fell, and broke her wrist. Everything else in the space was secure, so my friend thought she could take her eyes off her 18-month-old to help her other child. Accidents can happen in the safest home. Babyproofing isn’t foolproof, and kids still get hurt. The latest gadget doesn’t take the place of your attention.
So what do you do?
If over-babyproofing is a problem and not babyproofing sounds like crazy talk, how do you land in that happy medium? Look for safe spaces where you can lighten up on babyproofing. Keep the latch on the cabinet with the cleaning products, but take it off the one with the toilet paper.
Then aim for some self-awareness. Do you not trust yourself or your husband? Do you let fear control your thoughts? Do you think your child getting hurt means you’re a bad mom? That’s false. I know that when the fear starts to well up inside me, I take a deep breath, pray, and remind myself that God loves my kids more than I do. I can’t say I throw caution to the wind, but it might give me enough peace to run to Target to make a return.
What babyproofing is a must for you, and what’s something you think is too much?
